December 6, 2014

Xmas shopping

Have you bought all your Xmas presents yet? I'm done. It's a good feeling, too. It seems like I bought good, appropriate gifts that all my recipients will like. Unfortunately, I always think that and it's rarely never true. Guess I'll find out later this month.

Black Friday and Cyber Monday were pretty awful this year, no? I mean, they were out to git us. Did you see Amazon's idiotic deals page? It was just like watching QVC on the teevee -- a ton of items you don't want or need, flying by on the screen, waiting for a sucker to pounce on them. "Honey, we just gotta buy that rhinestone suit with an American flag theme for momma! We gotta!"

I was also pissed off by the sale sites' insistence on magic words to score a discount. "Don't forget to enter IMAFOOL on the checkout page to get an extra 15% off!" I just figure there are a lot of addled brains out there who won't see this tip, or will forget to enter IMAFOOL by the time they get to the checkout page. Alzheimers, anyone? Why put an extra hurdle out there for your customers? Just pick a sale price and go with it. Oh, I forgot: it's a scam.

Retailers are all about the money. They're supposed to have it, not you, so they're gonna get it any way they can. On one site, I didn't forget to enter IMAFOOL; there just wasn't anywhere to enter the code. Seriously, there was no box for the code. So when the order went through, I wrote them and asked them to apply it. They wrote back "thanking" me for pointing this out so they didn't "overlook" it. Uh huh. I'm sure that's exactly how it went down. Just an oversight on their part.

But shopping is done. Woot! Now I can fall into the mass daydream we call "the Christmas season". For a month, we are commanded to believe that all is calm, all is bright, and the world is filled with people of goodwill.

That must be why so many people are getting killed by cops or bombs -- because everything is so calm and bright.

Merry Xmas, everyone! Ho ho ho.

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