September 21, 2013

A common problem often seen in print

I've spoken about snarled sentences on many occasions. Here's one I found on Al Jazeera today:
The acclaimed Haitian-American writer talks about what it means to be a voice of the diaspora and her latest novel.
There's a problem in that sentence. She isn't talking about being the voice of her latest novel, as it says above. (She's the voice of both the diaspora and "her latest novel" in that sentence.) This problem occurs because the sentence is written backwards. There's a simple fix for this particular snarl: reverse the final items. First the novel, then the diaspora. Here's how it should read:
The acclaimed Haitian-American writer talks about her latest novel and what it means to be a voice of the diaspora.
See how that works? When you notice this problem in your writing, apply this simple cure. (If you still don't know what I'm talking about, compare the two sentences. I think you may say "Ahhhh!")

No comments: