January 28, 2012

The TV repercussions of relationships

My advice to couples is this: don't move in together! Keep your own place, your safe nook. Relationships come and go and if you're living with a person as the two of you are breaking up, you're living in hell. Always maintain your own residence. And for dog's sake, don't get married!

But will you listen to me? Of course not. You'll rush into it, throwing caution to the wind. You'll see. And in the meantime you'll discover something almost too horrible to imagine: the TV viewing habits of your partner. Shudder.

I've had several long-term relationships of varying length. And in each, I couldn't believe what my lovers watched on TV. Let's see. One thought Laverne and Shirley was the funniest show ever. He watched reruns every night, hooting at every line.

Another insisted on watching not I Love Lucy, which would have been fine, but The Lucy Show. Oy. There wasn't one funny moment on that show. Ever.

Yet another had a favorite show that was on in the afternoon. Luckily, I was usually at work so I didn't have to watch him watching it. He actually thought The Price is Right was a fabulous show. Fabulous! On the rare occasions when I stayed home from work (I worked days, he worked nights) I could not believe how excited he was when it came on. I mean, he'd be screaming, "Come on down!!!!" like he was one of the maniacs in the audience.

Never ever move in with someone. But if you do, and you find out the person watches stuff like this, cancel the cable (if not the boyfriend). My advice.

Anyone else horrified by their partner's TV habits? Do tell. And don't worry about your partner seeing your comment. This is the internet. And what happens on the internet stays on the internet. It's totally private.

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